Think of this week as the first installment of The Looper’s Most Money Player of the Week –– it’s like an MVP award, except we are dealing solely with how “money” someone is.
By money I am referring to a combination of several qualities but, most importantly, the “clutchness” of our recipient.
Generally, the award-winner is going to be someone who is money and is so money they don’t know it. Actually –– and I know the math might sound a bit cuckoo –– a person is exponentially more money if they don’t know it. It could be an act, it could be genuine, but either way it’s adorable.
If you’ve followed me this far, you probably have a good idea of the origins of this idea.
If you aren’t sure what I’m talking about, fire up your Netflix and put “Swingers” on your queue.
If you don’t love it, then you can blame the caddy. That’s nothing new on my end.
So, drum roll please … for The Looper’s inaugural Most Money award … the winners are: Mike Lowell, Dustin Pedroia and Jacoby Ellsbury of the Boston Red Sox. [Insert: fanfare, pomp and circumstance.] I know, I know, I’ve got three winners, not one.
Please, bear with me.
Lowell has been incredibly money all season, not just lately, something my dad has pointed out continuously. He’s been high on Lowell for months and while I concurred, I was not nearly as vocal. I was merely waiting to see what transpired.
Boy was there some fatherly wisdom there.
If not for the gigantic collective shadow of Ortiz and Ramirez in the heart of the roster, or A-Rod’s gaudy numbers, Lowell would be the frontrunner in the American League MVP race.
His numbers and overall performance demonstrate just how money he is.
All season long and into the playoffs, Lowell has been the most consistent player in the Red Sox lineup, with the glove and the bat. Of late, though, it’s been the Red Sox’ youngsters, Pedroia and Ellsbury, who’ve stolen the show and epitomized all that is money.
When Pedroia knocked that home run in the seventh inning of game one against the Rockies … whew! I almost jumped through the living room ceiling.
If my boy at second base doesn’t get Rookie of the Year I think we should organize a nation-wide sit-down protest. All I’ve got to say is, “Who’s coming with me?”
Then, there’s Ellsbury.
The 23-year-old speedster was inserted into the lineup against the Indians and has proceeded to scorch the Rockies, collecting four hits, two runs and two RBIs in game three.
As if his on-field performance weren’t money enough, it’s reaping benefits for all of us.
His stolen base in game two got everyone a free taco from Taco Bell.
That’s as money as it gets.