Shoutout to Michael Vick.
Not to be confused with “my man, Michael Vick.”
This week it was announced that the Atlanta Falcons star quarterback would spend the next 23 months in prison as a result of his role in a dogfighting organization.
For the next 2 years, while the Falcons struggle miserably, Vick will do the same, essentially living the next chapter of his life like a dog — a life without freedom or choice — but instead, one with commands and limitations (get some!).
Listed below are several striking parallels between the life of a dog and that of Michael Vick’s in prison:
1) When he is asked to speak, he will speak.
2) When he is asked to sit, he will sit.
3) When he is hungry, he will wait until fed.
4) When he wants to go out, he will wait until let out.
5) When he does something bad, he will be punished for it.
6) When another dog attacks, he will try to defend himself.
It’s really a shame that this article had to be written, but it’s even more of a shame that such a gifted athlete had to ruin his image by committing such senseless acts.
And although we cannot be sure what will happen to Vick after his sentence, this list, along with our imagination, can give us a pretty good idea of what will happen during his sentence.